The Games Begin

Hi Taylor.

I was thinking earlier today how something in me was craving a new song. I remember scanning the page of titles there at YouTube, looking for a new song from somebody. If not a new song, then anything new. Maybe a new trailer is out?

But being Sunday, and seeing that nobody ever releases a song on Sunday .. I seemed relegated to sit with this shitty sense of dissatisfaction.

» A Sense of Dissatisfaction Spurs the Artist to Greater Heights of Creativity

Surely you are familiar with the vague sense of dissatisfaction that comes from time to time .. when you feel like you are wanting something, or needing something .. yet you are not really sure what it is that you want or you need.

I dont think that this uncomfortable sense of dissatisfaction is limited to the artist. Perhaps the artist just feels it more accutely. More sharply. More exquisitely.

I read this thing that said it was this sense of dissatisfaction that was the thing that spurred the artist to ever greater heights of creativity. So we should therefore embrace it, and welcome it, and rejoice at its arrival.

Easier said than done. Much easier.

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Going Stupid-Dumb

I know a little something about going stupid-dumb. More than a little, actually. I confess that I do indeed feel qualified to address the subject. Well qualified .. with plenty of firsthand experience.

He Like That | Fifth Harmony official video

I might even be something of an expert on the subject.

The term stupid implies that you are not thinking clearly. While dumb implies that your ability to form words has somehow been compromised.

Why might you be thinking unclearly? And why might you be having trouble forming words, or putting things into words?

Going stupid-dumb with Lauren

These are good questions.

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Master of Anticipation - Page Two

[ This entry continues from » here. ]

» What Kinds of Things Will You Evoke?

Arent you curious about what kinds of things I will write to you? I certainly am.

Jesy and Jade singing Touch Summertime Ball June 10, 2017

[ This is a curious image here .. because Jesy is singing, but you are looking at the camera. I am not sure why this image works me .. but it does. The attention is not sure where it should be focused. ]

I write different things to different singers because different girls elict and evoke different parts of my personality.

What kinds of things will you be evoking within me? Fuck if I know. There's really only one way to find out.

Every secret of a writer's soul .. quote by Virginia Woolf

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Master of Anticipation - Page One

[ This entry originated » here. ]

» Jade Feels Me

I see you, Jade. That's how it starts, you know.

Jade sings 'master of anticipation' Summertime Ball Wembley June 10, 2017

[ Look at you singing here. I captured this image where you are singing 'master of anticipation' .. because it goes with my title.

Is it just me .. or do you not seem to be very much enjoying yourself while singing this part?

Where do you go in your mind when you sing this part? What are you thinking about here? What kinds of things are you drawing upon? What emotions do you summon? You wanna fool around?

Oops .. where did that last question come from? (I am looking over both shoulders.)

Sometimes I say things that surprise me when I say them .. particularly when I am talking to pretty girls like you.

I had similar thoughts with this image of Ariana. This is deep girly stuff. A thing to behold. An enchanting thing.

You are obviously a very pretty girl. And talented. And sexy. Please stop me .. before I get carried away.

I can see that I definitely have a thing for singers. I can't help myself. ]

I should not tell you who you remind me of.

Do you have a kinky power fetish? Like Nicki and Ariana?

[ Even Miriam knows (at t=2:35) that Nicki has a thing for power. I see you, Miriam. Nice to meet you. Nicki here made me think of this article by Jonita Davis. I wonder what she thinks of that. Here is another thing worth mentioning. ]

What did Ariana tell you about me? I know that you girls are on tour with her .. on her dangerous tour.

I'm sure that you mustve chatted about things. Probably in some dimly lit corner somewhere. Does she kiss-n-tell?

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[ This entry is continued from » Page One. ]

» Power = Energy Deposited Per Unit Time

In physics, ENERGY is defined as the » ability to do work .. to perform work (on something).

[ You know about energy .. I've been teaching you.

There are many kinds of energy .. but I like yours best. ]

More energy provides the ability to do more work. That work may or may not be performed using the energy, but without it, you cannot do the work.

In your case, you might say that the "work" you are performing in Manchester is of an emotional and psychic nature. Certainly your effort there is considered therapeutic.

Ariana back in Manchester ahead of tomorrow's emotional charity concert

[ Girly, I cant help but wonder why the folks at GMA chose this particular image of you. You look very self-possessed in this image. Very confident. You seem to be saying, "Do I look scared? I think not."

I remember when I first saw that performance .. I was all kinds of impressed. I could hear the clicking sound of your stilettos echoing quietly through the marble corridors of my soul.

I remember thinking, "Oh, this girl is so doing it for me." If I were there, you wouldve been cleaning pebbles out of your hair. It's not usually a good thing when girls make me feel aggressive.

Notice how the definition of the word 'concert' aptly applies here .. to your charity benefit there. ]

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[ This entry originated » here. ]

» World-Class Huggers

Oh, this is very cool. Look at the look on this girl's face. Priceless.

Ariana with 8-year-old Lily Harrison at Manchester Children's hospital June 3, 2017

You are obviously a good hugger, girly. World-class.

» Lily Looks So Happy

Here's another. This is precious. This makes my heart sing. I can hear it singing.

Ariana with 8-year-old Lily Harrison at Manchester Children's hospital June 3, 2017

This girl looks so happy. You can see it all over her face. Who can blame her? They didnt even look this happy when Queen Elizabeth herself stopped by.

Kids are so honest. Whether they are happy or not .. is always plainly evident. They have not yet learned how to be deceptive.

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Such a Drastic Contrast in Manchester

My heart sank when I saw the news yesterday. It seemed so surreal. The effect of the images that accompanied the story felt like they cut me off at the knees.

New York Times homepage May 23, 2017 Manchester suicide bombing

The consequences of this attack are profoundly sad on so many levels .. that they seem impossible to fathom. This is why there is mind-blowing aspect to such things.

» Truly Remarkable Responses

Denise Evans wrote a wonderful piece on » Manchester's Resilience

And Natalie Shutler wrote another titled » What an Attack at an Ariana Grande Show Means for Teen Girls.

» Hard-Pressed to Find

James Corden said about Manchester that "A more tight-knit group of people you would be hard-pressed to find. Strong, proud, caring people."

James Corden's message to Manchester

Who does not want to grow up in, and call home, a place like that?

This article contains a telling statement:

As graffiti on a disused rail depot not far from Piccadilly train station has it, Manchester sees itself as "a haven for heathens, hoodies and hipsters, hijabis and Hebrews, highbrow intellectuals and however-you-sexuals ... it's home to all."

That sounds like my kind of town .. where they live and let live .. absent the mental illnesses typically associated with repression.

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I Cant Quit You Either

Girly, I was really trying not to write this entry today. I was distracting myself in a million different ways. But I cant seem to quit you either.

(It looks like we're stuck with each other.)

» Why Am I Writing This and Not That?

From a certain perspective, I watch myself work with you. And I can see that one of the key determinants in whether or not I write about a certain thing is » the range of themes that come into play.

And how distinctive these themes are that are brought into play. And also whether I have firsthand experience regarding these themes. And how much firsthand experience I might happen to have.

And this song opens up such things for me. (Write what only you can write.)

Sometimes I catch myself wondering, "Is she doing that on purpose (.. to fuck with me)? Or are we simply resonating naturally?"

These things start talking to me. And if these things being said are very unique .. then such things demand more forcefully to be written. Because we might never get back here again.

If I continued down this tangent much further, I would start to sound like a nutcase.

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Blow's Backhanded Compliment

[ Note that this entry originated » here. ]

Nicki, did you notice that Blow posted a column today .. where he said some things about Americans in "this digital age".. along with a photo of students protesting in New York?

Students protesting in New York

He does not come right out and say that he is referring to the youth, but this is definitely the impression that I came away with. You?

» Thus Spake Blow

I am referring specifically to where he wrote:

I must say that the issue of resilience was one that I worried and wondered about from the beginning: For far too many Americans in this digital age, stamina is rare, attention spans are short and the urge for instant gratification, or at least for expedient resolution, is enormous.

I worried that modern shortsightedness would prevent resisters from seeing the long game, that the exhaustion of constant outrage would numb them to unrelenting assault.

I know what Blow is saying here .. but his statements struck me as .. well, they struck me in the same way that some of his other statements have struck me.

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Feeling Less Fucked-Up - Page Two

[ This entry continues from » here. ]

» Establishing a Rudimentary Basecamp at a Remote Outpost

My point in citing these two writers (Hemingway & Sophy) is that .. when I find myself in a place that I have never been before .. or when I find myself with thoughts that I have never thought before ..

.. this is the #1 thing that drives me to write. Even if I am tired, or dont feel like it .. this is the #1 thing that gets me writing.

Because this means I am at the place that Sophy referred to. And because, once I write this thing, then that establishes a sort of basecamp from which I can explore even further.

You also get points for originality and authenticity when you generate such ideas organically. But this is not the primary reason why I exert such effort to capture these thoughts and ideas.

The primary reason is to establish an idea-basecamp of sorts .. from which I can explore further .. even if this basecamp is not constructed very well.

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